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PAYS TRIBUTE TO
JERRY ORBACH
1935-2004
WE HERE AT CAT TOWN MOURN THE LOSS OF JERRY ORBACH, STAR OF STAGE,
SCREEN
AND TELEVISION, and the best guest star we ever had
IN FACT, WE WERE SO IN MOURNING WE FORGOT TO PUT THIS TRIBUTE UP WHEN IT WOULD'VE BEEN TIMELY
I THINK THE THING I REMEMBER MOST ABOUT JERRY ORBACH WAS THAT HE WAS A
CONSUMMATE PROFESSIONAL, ALWAYS READY TO WORK AND DEFINITELY NOT A PRIMA
DONNA
HE SHOWED UP AT HIS CALL TIME, WHICH IS MORE THAN I CAN SAY FOR SOME OF
OUR REGULARS, HE KNEW HIS LINES AND HIS MARKS, AND HE WAS ALL SERIOUS AND
NO BULLS-- CAN I SAY THAT? NO, OK. HE WAS ALL SERIOUS AND NO B.S. IF YOU
KNOW WHAT THAT STANDS FOR
THOUGH HE COULD CRACK A JOKE AFTER A TAKE LIKE YOU WOULDN'T BELIEVE
I WAS ON THE SET READING THE SCRIPT AND HAVING A HARD TIME WITH ONE OF MY
LINES, I THINK IT HAD TO DO WITH UNREQUITED LOVE OR SOMETHING, AND JERRY
SAW ME AND CAME OVER AND ASKED IF I NEEDED HELP
AND I DON'T MEAN BACHELOR OF SCIENCES, EITHER, I'M THINKING OF A BAD
WORD
I THINK I MUST'VE SEEN 42nd STREET ABOUT A HUNDRED TIMES WHEN I WAS
GROWING UP, ANY TIME I HAD MONEY I'D STAND IN LINE AT TKTS ALL DAY JUST
FOR A BALCONY SEAT
I ADMIT, I HAD A SERIOUS CATNIP PROBLEM THE WEEK HE GUEST-STARRED, AND I
FELT JUST AWFUL BECAUSE I DIDN'T WANT TO LOOK BAD IN THE EYES OF THE GUY
WHO PLAYED A CANDLESTICK IN BEAUTY AND THE BEAST
JERRY SAID SOMETIMES THE WAY TO GET INTO YOUR CHARACTER IS TO FIND A
SIMILAR EVENT FROM YOUR PAST, AND USE THAT AS YOUR EMOTIONAL BASE, AND HE
ASKED IF I HAD EVER HAD A CRUSH ON SOMEONE, AND I FELT KINDA SILLY BUT I
SAID YEAH, I ONCE HAD A CRUSH ON MICHAEL YORK
BOY COULD HE DANCE
YEAH HE COULD DANCE LIKE NOBODY'S BUSINESS
BUT NOT OLD AND CRUSTY MICHAEL YORK LIKE IN AUSTIN POWERS, I MEAN YOUNG AND CUTE MICHAEL YORK LIKE IN LOGAN'S RUN
ONCE WE WERE IN THE MIDDLE OF A TAKE AND THE LIGHTS WENT OUT UNEXPECTEDLY,
AND NOBODY KNEW WHAT TO DO, AND JERRY SAID WELL, AIN'T THAT LIKE A
DIRECTOR, ALWAYS KEEPING US IN THE DARK, AND IT BROKE THE TENSION AND WE
ALL LAUGHED, EVEN THE DIRECTOR
HE HAD THE SUN IN THE MORNING AND THE MOON AT NIGHT, THAT'S FOR SURE
DURING REHEARSAL JERRY TOOK ME ASIDE AND SAID LISTEN, I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE
GOING THROUGH, AND I KNOW IT'S TOUGH, BUT I'M GONNA BE YOUR GUARDIAN
ANGEL, OKAY, AND I'M GONNA MAKE SURE YOU GET HELP, BUT FIRST I'M GONNA
TAKE YOUR CATNIP AND FLUSH IT DOWN THE TOILET, AND I CALLED HIM A FEW
SWEAR WORDS BUT HE DID IT ANYWAY
HE WAS A GREAT KISSER, I MEAN, I'VE GOT IT ON VERY GOOD AUTHORITY THAT
HE WAS A GREAT KISSER
SO HE SAID WELL WHEN YOU'RE WITH EL GUAPO IN YOUR NEXT SCENE, PRETEND HE'S
MICHAEL YORK, AND I SAID OKAY, AND I DID IT, AND YOU KNOW, I THINK THE
EMOTION REALLY CAME THROUGH AS IT SHOULD HAVE
AND YOU KNOW, I HAVEN'T TOUCHED THE STUFF SINCE THAT DAY, AND HE CALLED ME
UP EVERY WEEK OR SO FOR A FEW MONTHS AFTERWARDS JUST TO MAKE SURE I WAS
DOING OKAY
IF YOU WERE ON FIRE I AM SURE HE WOULD TAKE THE TIME TO PUT IT OUT, THAT'S
THE KIND OF GREAT GUY HE WAS
HE ALSO SMELLED GREAT
COME TO THINK OF IT I'M REALLY NOT SURE I GOT THE JOKE, BUT HE SAID IT IN
A VERY FUNNY WAY
THE LAST DAY HE WAS WITH US, WE'D FINISHED UP EARLY AND OF COURSE SOMEONE
BROUGHT A PIANO OUT AND STARTED TO PLAY, AND WE BUGGED HIM TO SING A
LITTLE, AND HE DID, AND IT WAS SO GREAT, I THINK WE HAVE IT HERE
SOMEWHERE
WE SURE DO, HERE'S THE CLIP
MR
ORBACH, DO YOU THINK YOU HAVE THE TIME TO SING A LITTLE FOR US?
LIKE I SAID, CALL ME JERRY, AND I DUNNO, YOU GUYS,
IT'S BEEN A LONG
TIME, I MAY HAVE
FORGOTTEN ALL THOSE
WONDERFUL SONGS I'VE SUNG ON BROADWAY SO MANY
YEARS AGO
OH COME ON, YOU MUST KNOW ONE, MAYBE HUM A LITTLE OR SOMETHING, etc
WELL TELL YOU WHAT, MAYBE IF I PUT MY MIND TO IT, I COULD... TRY TO
REMEMBER...
^_^
...THE KIND OF SEPTEMBER
WHEN LIFE WAS SLOW AND OH SO MELLOW
TRY TO REMEMBER THE KIND OF SEPTEMBER
WHEN GRASS WAS GREEN AND GRAIN WAS YELLOW
TRY TO REMEMBER THE KIND OF SEPTEMBER
WHEN YOU WERE A TENDER AND CALLOW FELLOW
TRY TO REMEMBER, AND IF YOU REMEMBER
THEN FOLLOW
FOLLOW FOLLOW FOLLOW FOLLOW FOLLOW FOLLOW FOLLOW FOLLOW FOL-LOW
FOLLOW FOLLOW FOLLOW FOLLOW FOLLOW FOLLOW FOLLOW FOLLOW FOL-LOW
THAT WAS GREAT, YOU GUYS, YOU REALLY SHOULD BE ON BROADWAY
WE'LL SETTLE FOR OFF-OFF-OFF-OFF INSTEAD, HOW'S THAT
(put all the cat pictures here okay and jerry too)
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA
AND THAT'S THE WAY IT'S GOING DOWN IN
THE END
A RAZZLE DAZZLE PRODUCTION
 RASPBERRY JAM ALL OVER
THE CAT
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